


Flowers, Love Songs, and Other Cliches

by monochromekiss



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Ciel being an idiot, Eventual Romance, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-03-08 15:22:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13461048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monochromekiss/pseuds/monochromekiss
Summary: After seeing Sebastian badly wounded aboard the Campania, Ciel realises he has romantic feelings for his butler. He decides he will research the ways of romance and try and seduce his butler, but no matter what he tries things don't seem to go as planned.





	1. Research

 

Ciel Phantomhive had always thought of his demon butler as invincible. On many occasions Ciel had seen his butler receive injuries that would prove fatal to any human, only to get straight back up again and smirk as if it hadn't hurt in the slightest. Ciel had been so sure that no matter what happened; his butler would always, without fail, just get back up again. That was until that fateful night aboard the Campania.

The image of his butler lying in the middle of the small lifeboat, grimacing in pain and covered in blood refused to leave Ciel's mind. For a brief moment Ciel had even thought that his butler might die.

He had learnt something incredibly important that night. His butler wasn't invincible. There were weapons that could kill him, and injuries that would cause him pain. But Ciel had also learnt something incredibly important about himself. Up until that point, Ciel had thought of their relationship as nothing more than a bond of convenience. Ciel wanted revenge and needed a servant to help him accomplish that goal. Sebastian needed a soul. That was it.

And yet Ciel had felt something he'd never felt before. Seeing his butler so severely wounded, he had been overwhelmed with concern and fear. No matter how much he tried to explain it away, the answer was clear. He was emotionally attached to him. He cared for him deeply, loved him even.

A few days had passed since then and Sebastian had assured his master he would be perfectly fine in time. All he needed was plenty of rest so his wounds could heal. Sebastian could never lie to his master so if he said he would recover, then he would. But even so Ciel decided to spend most of the day by his side.

Ciel pulled up a chair to the side of the bed and watched his butler sleeping. He looked incredibly peaceful lying on his back, his eyes closed and his chest rising and falling rhythmically. Demons didn't usually require sleep so this was the first time Ciel had seen him like this.

"He looks beautiful…" Ciel mumbled softly to himself as he watched him. He then averted his gaze from his butler's sleeping form and back to the various books he had brought with him. He hoped that his butler wouldn't wake any time soon. If he were caught reading those sorts of books it would be rather difficult to explain, and apparently an important aspect of romance was surprise.

Yes, Ciel Phantomhive was reading romance novels. He had fallen in love with his butler and couldn't deny it anymore. But if he was going to do anything about it he wanted to do things properly. He would do things, quite literally, by the book.

They were the sorts of books filled with clichés like flowers, love songs, dancing and overly dramatic proposals of marriage. The sorts of books that women would read and swoon over, thinking _One day that will be me!_

Ciel started to make notes as he went along, taking as many practical ideas from the books as he could. He pushed the pile of novels to one side and held up the list, letting out a satisfied sigh.

"Alright, this should be good enough." He said in a determined voice.

And so with that, Ciel knew what course of action he needed to take. As soon as Sebastian recovered, he would seduce him with the various things he had read. After all, if it was so easy in books then how hard could it be in real life?


	2. Flowers

 

It only took one week for Sebastian to recover fully and return to his usual self. For the whole week Ciel had barely left his side but was far too embarrassed to tell him. He wasn't sure whether Sebastian being asleep the whole time was a blessing or not. On the one hand, he was embarrassed by the fact he had been so concerned he had stayed there the whole week. But on the other hand, perhaps if Sebastian had been awake to see how much Ciel cared he wouldn't need to resort to getting ideas from romance novels.

Ciel was incredibly relieved when his butler's wounds were fully healed. Not only did he no longer have to worry, but he could finally put his plan into action.

While Sebastian busied himself with various butler duties, Ciel sat in his study as he usually would. He pulled out the list he had made from a drawer and read through it again. First on the list was one word. _Flowers._

After reading through a large collection of novels, Ciel had noticed the most common gift given to the lady was a bouquet of flowers. Of course, Sebastian wasn't a lady but he assumed the effect would more or less be the same. And it would be completely impossible to find books about a romance between two men.

Ciel hid the list back in the drawer of his desk before leaving his study. He then made his way to the manor gardens, being careful not to bump into Sebastian along the way. It felt strange for him to be creeping around his own home but it was necessary to keep his intentions a surprise.

Luckily, the gardens were empty so Ciel didn't have to worry about bumping into Finny either. He walked over to one of the rosebushes and gazed at the beautiful flowers for a moment, but then something occurred to him. White roses were his favourite flower, but they wouldn't necessarily be something Sebastian would like.

_White roses are beautiful though. Perhaps I should just give him these. No…the whole point of this is to give him something he would like._

Ciel continued to walk around the garden, looking through all the various flower beds.

_This is difficult. How am I supposed to know what kind of flowers he would like?! He's never told me!_

Ciel started to feel more and more frustrated as he walked past the different varieties of flowers. None of them seemed to be the sort of thing that would appeal to Sebastian, if demons were even able to appreciate the beauty of flowers. As he walked briskly through the gardens he stopped suddenly, drawn to one flower in particular. They were large roses but instead of being white, they were a deep red colour.

_Maybe he will like these more. They're a beautiful shade of red, just like his eyes. Maybe I could tell him that when I give them to him. That would make it more romantic._

With a content smile Ciel started enthusiastically picking the roses and gathering them up into a bouquet. He picked every single one and tied them together with a small ribbon. As he walked backed into the manor he didn't bother to look back at the now bare rosebush which was an ugly sight.

Ciel retreated back to his study and examined the bouquet again, letting out a content sigh. It was a large bouquet with every single rose he had picked in full bloom, and he had even managed to tie the ribbon in a nice bow.

"Sebastian!" Ciel called out, knowing his butler would come almost immediately. He stood by the side of his desk and placed the bouquet behind his back. His cheeks flushed slightly pink as he thought about the embarrassing line he planned to say.

_Sebastian, I saw these and thought of you. They're a beautiful shade of red, just like your eyes._

Within a few seconds his butler appeared by his side, although he looked rather stressed about something.

"Yes, young master?" He asked.

"I…S-Seb…Sebastian… I umm…" Ciel stuttered nervously as he desperately tried to remember all the words. Before he had a chance to continue any further Sebastian interrupted him.

"Is it important, young master? You see, I still haven't finished cleaning up that fool's mess." He said in an exasperated tone.

"What mess?" Ciel asked, looking up at him curiously.

"That idiotic gardener has picked every single red rose in the garden, leaving it in a dreadfully ugly state. He swears that he doesn't remember doing it which makes me even more annoyed. Honestly…" Sebastian replied, letting out an annoyed sigh. "Now I will have to replant the whole thing. I've only just recovered from my injuries and they're already creating more work for me." He added.

"So…those roses being picked has annoyed you?" Ciel asked, biting his bottom lip softly. He felt a wave of anger flooding through him. The mood had been ruined before he even had a chance to give his butler the bouquet.

"Yes, of course it has. As I said, it's given me more work." Sebastian replied, completely oblivious to how much he was hurting Ciel's feelings. There was a long awkward silence between them. Sebastian looked down at his master curiously who seemed completely frozen in place.

"Young master? Isn't there something you wanted?" He asked.

"Never mind! Just go and tend to the garden!" Ciel shouted angrily, refusing to look up at his butler. Behind his back his hands clenched into fists, crushing the beautiful roses.

Sebastian raised an eyebrow at his master's strange behaviour but decided to not question it any further.

Once Ciel was alone again he unclenched his fists, taking a deep breath to try and calm down. His eyes widened when he saw the state the roses were now in. They were crushed and mangled with most of the petals falling away.

_Damn it… these are completely ruined. I can't give him these. Although it would just annoy him if he knew I picked them anyway._

Ciel sat back in his chair and sighed, placing the empty stems and crushed rose petals into the drawer.

_Stupid demon… it's his fault for getting angry when someone is just trying to be romantic!_

He laid his head on the desk, overcome with anger and sadness. The first plan had been a complete failure. Snapping at his butler to leave and calling him for no apparent reason probably annoyed him even more. But there was still time to make up for it. Ciel still had plenty of ideas he could use. He would simply discard the idea of giving flowers and move on to the next thing on his list.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double post because the first part is so very short. I haven't posted or updated anything for ages, and I really just wanted to post something. So this is a really old work I originally posted on FF.net that I'm slightly rewriting. It's not that good I know but this is what happens when I have severe writer's block.


	3. Love Song

 

 

Ciel spent the next few hours in his study, thinking over everything that had transpired. It hadn't been a very good start to his plan. Elsewhere in the manor Sebastian was busy as usual, probably scolding Finny for something he hadn't even done but Ciel didn't really care about that.

He pulled out the list from his drawer yet again and looked at the next thing on the list. The next idea he had written down would be quite a challenge, but Ciel was still determined to at least try. He grimaced as he stared down at the two words he had written. _Love Song._

Ciel pushed the list back into the drawer along with the pile of rose petals he had aimlessly put away in there. He then placed some blank paper in front of him, picked up his quill and prepared to write. There was only problem. No words came to mind.

Ciel stared at the blank paper for a further ten minutes but the result remained the same. He couldn't think of a single thing to write down. Ciel closed his eyes and set his quill down, sighing in frustration.

_It can't be that hard… it doesn't need to be really long or the best piece of literary work. Just something from the heart. But what?!_

Ciel opened his eyes and picked up the quill, refusing to waste any more time. He started to write the first thing he could think of about his butler.

_Your hair is dark and beautiful, like the night sky._

_I feel so lost when I stare into your devilish eyes._

Ciel shook his head and tapped his quill against the table in frustration. Something seemed rather off about it. It rhymed, yes. And it described his butler perfectly. But "devilish" was probably not a good word to use. If anything, it sounded like an insult. Ciel quickly scribbled the word out and replaced it with something else.

_Your hair is dark and beautiful, like the night sky._

_I feel so lost when I stare into your_ ~~_devilish_ ~~ _beautiful eyes._

Ciel then let out another groan. That didn't seem right either. He had used the word beautiful twice already and had only written two lines. Ciel crossed out the first "beautiful" and tried to replace it with something different.

 _Your hair is dark and_ ~~_beautiful_ ~~ _mysterious, like the night sky._

 _I feel so lost when I stare into your_ ~~_devilish_ ~~ _beautiful eyes._

Ciel stared down at the paper in front of him for a moment. That didn't sound right either. Referring to Sebastian's hair as mysterious made absolutely no sense, unless he was implying something was hidden in there. And that sounded like an even worse insult than saying he had devilish eyes. There was also something else that was starting to bother him. Saying he felt "lost" didn't seem very romantic. It sounded quite depressing. So Ciel got to work changing the words again.

 _Your hair is dark and_ ~~_beautiful_ _mysterious_~~ _stunning like the night sky._

 ~~_I feel so lost_ ~~ _My heart beats faster when I stare into your_ ~~_devilish_ ~~ _beautiful eyes._

Ciel groaned even louder than before, throwing his quill down and dropping his head into his hands. He still wasn't completely happy with his word choice, and he had made so many changes it was starting to look a mess. "Ah, forget it! I'll just start over!" Ciel said angrily through gritted teeth as he scrunched up the piece of paper and threw it over his shoulder.

This endless cycle continued for an hour until Sebastian walked into the study with afternoon tea.

"Young master, I've brought you some tea." Sebastian stated as he started pouring the tea into the cup. He placed the cup down on the desk beside his master, who was slouched over with his head lying on the desk. When Ciel didn't even bother to look up, Sebastian thought he might have fallen asleep. "Young master?" he asked curiously, gently nudging Ciel's arm.

"In a minute…I'm thinking." Was the mumbled reply he got, Ciel still refusing to lift his head from the desk. Sebastian raised an eyebrow at his master's odd behaviour. He then looked down at the large amount of scrunched up balls of paper that littered the floor.

"I see. You've been working hard it seems" Sebastian said, although there was a hint of confusion in his voice. As far as he was aware his master didn't have any outstanding paperwork to finish.

Ciel finally lifted his head from his desk and let out a long groan. He leant back in his chair and closed his eyes, holding a hand to his head. "Ah…this is giving me a headache." He mumbled.

"In that case, would you like me to bring you some medicine for the pain, young master?" Sebastian asked. For a moment Ciel didn't answer. Instead he opened his eyes and slowly turned to look at him.

_Wait, this might be a good opportunity. If Sebastian is right in front of me then surely it will be easier to write something…_

With that thought in mind Ciel continued to stare at Sebastian intently, his eyes wandering up and down his tall body.

Sebastian stared back at him, completely bewildered. "Young master?" He asked.

"No, I'm fine. Just stand there." Ciel replied, picking up his quill yet again. He gave his butler one last stare before he turned his eyes back to the paper. Ideas came flooding to him but not in any coherent order. So many things he loved about Sebastian were swirling around in his head; his soft smooth voice like velvet, his gorgeous pale skin, his beautiful eyes, his gentle touches and his warmth he felt whenever Sebastian dressed him or carried him, his unique scent that felt so comforting. And yet even with all these thoughts in mind Ciel still couldn't write anything. Ciel tapped his quill against the desk impatiently again.

"Anything I can help with, my lord?" Sebastian asked as he leant in close to his master. Ciel jumped and let out a surprised yelp. He hadn't noticed Sebastian moving closer to him at all.

"Ah, it's fine…don't do that!" Ciel snapped, shaking his head. He picked up the quill and started to write again. He decided to completely forget trying to make it rhyme and just write whatever felt natural.

_Your voice is so smooth like velvet. My heart and soul trembles when I hear it, your warm breath caressing my ear._

Ciel blushed at the last part. Unintentionally he had written something that sounded quite sexual. He went to cross it out but jumped when he noticed Sebastian leaning in close again.

"What are you writing, young master?" Sebastian inquired. Ciel's cheeks flushed a dark pink in embarrassment, quickly snatching the piece of paper away.

"What?! N-nothing! None of your business! Just get out!" He shouted. As soon as the words left his mouth he instantly regretted it. Once again he had spoken unnecessarily harsh to his butler.

"Very well, young master. I'll leave you in peace." Sebastian replied, annoyance evident in his tone. He shot Ciel a disapproving glance before walking back out of the study.

As the study door slammed and he was left alone again, Ciel collapsed back on to his desk. He screwed up the piece of paper he had been writing on and threw it on to the floor beside the others. Hours had passed since he had first decided to try and write, and he had accomplished nothing. Rather than write something from the heart, he had gone and made things worse again.

_This was a terrible idea. I can't write stuff like that. I'll just do something else for him. Besides, it's not like I would have wanted to sing it out loud anyway…_

Ciel got up from his desk and started to pick up the failed attempts of his love song from the floor. He discarded them all into the wicker basket by his desk and sat back down. "Well…never mind, on to the next idea." Ciel whispered quietly to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's an update! And this shouldn't really be taking me this long since this is an old work I'm just rewriting slightly. But I have other things I'm trying to work on, or should be working on... so this is taking a while. I really relate to how Ciel feels in this chapter. Writers block is terrible.  
> I also now know how it feels to only have one decent eye, but luckily that's temporary. Yep, I managed to update a fanfic when one of my eyes isn't working properly. Do I get redeeming points for that?


	4. Homemade Food

 

It wasn't until the following morning that Ciel decided he would give romancing Sebastian another try. Sebastian came into his room to wake him, dressing him and serving him breakfast as usual. Neither of them bothered to mention the crossed words they had exchanged the day before.

Ciel was quite grateful that Sebastian didn't bring it up. He didn't want his butler to realise what he was up to; at least not until he had successfully done something romantic for him.

After finishing breakfast Ciel sent Sebastian on an errand to get him out of the manor. He would need his butler away from the kitchen if he was going to be able to complete the next task. Ciel took one quick glance at the next thing on his list before heading there. _Homemade food._

Ciel had never had to cook for himself or anyone else before. His food had always been prepared by someone else and brought to him, which was to be expected of an earl. Members of the nobility didn't waste time slaving over a hot stove. They had servants to do that for them. But this time, Ciel decided he was going to make an exception.

He walked into the kitchen, immediately spotting his short-tempered and impatient chef standing there. The chef looked puzzled when he saw him standing awkwardly in the doorway.

"Young master? What are ya doin' in the kitchen? Is there somethin' I can get for ya?" He asked.

"Not exactly, there's something I need you to help me with." Ciel replied, walking over to him.

"Help? From me? What 'bout Mr Sebastian?" He asked, still looking as puzzled as before.

"Yes, this is something he can't help me with. You see…" Ciel trailed off suddenly, his cheeks flushing a bright shade of pink as he stared down at his feet. "I um…I want to learn how to make something. Like biscuits or maybe some fairy cakes…" He mumbled nervously.

"I can make something like that for ya!" Baldroy replied confidently, a huge grin on his face.

Ciel sighed since his chef had completely missed the point. "It's not for me! It's a present for someone so…I want to make them myself." Ciel explained, still staring down at his feet. He looked up at the chef slowly when he felt his hand being placed on his shoulder.

"A present for Lady Elizabeth?" He asked.

"Umm…" Ciel averted his gaze nervously. For a moment he considered just agreeing with him, but there was a possibility Baldroy would mention it to her. Then it would look very odd when he didn't give her anything. He could possibly make some for Sebastian and some for her as well. But then giving some to Lizzie could upset Sebastian, and he had already upset his butler enough.

"No? Got another girl ya like, young master?" Baldroy asked, pulling Ciel from his thoughts suddenly. Ciel just stared up at him with his mouth hanging open, unsure of what to say. Baldroy patted his shoulder gently, grinning at him. "No need to be shy, young master. I know how it is. Can't do nothing 'bout liking more than one pretty girl, right? It's totally normal. I won't tell Lady Elizabeth." He told him, giving him a cheeky wink.

"Uh, yes…thank you." Ciel replied. He couldn't possibly tell Baldroy who the present was really for but at least he now wouldn't have to make some for Lizzie too.

With the issue of who the present was for put aside, Baldroy got to work gathering up the ingredients they would need. Ciel wasn't sure what sweet thing Sebastian would like best but decided to make some simple shortbread biscuits. He could shape them into hearts and decorate them with red icing. It was a bit cliché perhaps but if it worked in the romance novels then surely it would in real life.

Baldroy surprised Ciel by how talented he was at baking. Everything was going perfectly and the biscuits looked even better than Ciel imagined. For a while Ciel wondered how on earth Baldroy managed to cause so many disasters if his skills were that impressive. He had his answer soon enough. Only five minutes after the biscuits had been placed in the oven and the chef started to become impatient.

"This is going a bit slow. How 'bout speeding things up a bit?" Baldroy asked as he picked up a flamethrower.

"Wait, wait, wait, no! Just leave them as they are!" Ciel shouted in a panic.

By the time the biscuits were ready Ciel was mentally exhausted. Several times he'd had to order his chef to put down various weaponry. It worried Ciel just how many flamethrowers, barrels of gunpowder and dynamite he had. But he had managed to stop any disasters from happening, and the biscuits came out perfectly golden rather than charcoal black.

Next, Baldroy showed Ciel how to decorate them. He covered them with red icing before adding small white roses made of fondant. Ciel smiled smugly as he admired the beautiful treats. Surely there was no way this could possibly fail.

When Sebastian returned to the manor Ciel was already waiting for him in his study, the beautiful biscuits laid out on a large plate.

"Young master, I managed to-" Sebastian started to say but Ciel raised his hand to silence him. He wasn't at all interested whether Sebastian had managed to gather all the elaborate things he had requested. It had just been a ploy to get him out of the manor long enough.

"Never mind that. I have something for you." Ciel said with a huge smirk on his face as he lifted up the plate towards his butler.

Sebastian raised an eyebrow as he looked at the plate of biscuits. "Shortbread hearts?" He asked in a puzzled voice.

"Yes. I made them myself." Ciel replied smugly.

"How?" Sebastian asked, looking even more confused.

Ciel let out an annoyed groan, shaking the plate at him impatiently. "I asked Baldroy to teach me. Does it matter how? Just eat one." Ciel sighed, sounding increasingly agitated.

Sebastian picked one up in his gloved hand, examining it closely. He smiled as he examined the work that had gone into it but made no attempt to actually eat it. "Oh for goodness sake, just eat it!" Ciel snapped, losing his patience. He watched nervously as his butler placed the biscuit in his mouth, chewing on it for a moment before swallowing. There was an awkward silence as Ciel waited to hear his butler's thoughts.

"Well? What do you think?" Ciel asked.

"Very well made, young master. They would certainly be considered delicious to a human." Sebastian replied.

Ciel smirked, a smug look on his face. "Well of course they are. Wait…what?" he asked, looking up at his butler curiously. "What do you mean to a human? You don't like them?" The little earl asked.

"It's not that I don't like them, young master. But demons don't have the same tastes as humans do. To me, all human food tastes more or less the same." Sebastian explained.

"Are you serious?!" Ciel shouted angrily, glaring up at him.

"I'm sorry young master. I can't help being a demon and having different tastes." Sebastian said as he gave his master a quizzical look.

"No, I suppose you can't. Well, never mind then…" Ciel mumbled softly, letting out a defeated sigh. His efforts had been wasted yet again, but he couldn't really blame his butler.

"May I ask why you went to this trouble for me?" Sebastian asked.

"Well I was… I just…" Ciel stuttered nervously, his cheeks flushing pink. "I umm… you… you saved my life at the risk of your own. It was my fault you were so badly injured so I just…those are…" Ciel trailed off once again. He looked up at his butler, surprised to see him smiling warmly.

"Thank you, young master. I appreciate the effort but you don't need to do that for me. Why don't I bring you some tea and you can eat the rest?" Sebastian replied. Ciel smiled back at him, his eyes widening a little in surprise. His butler looked genuinely happy. Even if the taste of the biscuits wasn't that nice for him, perhaps just the fact that Ciel had made them for him had made some impact.

"Yes, thank you." Ciel said with a nod. As he waited for his butler to return with the tea he leant back in his chair, letting out a content sigh. Finally he had managed to do something that actually pleased his butler.

Sebastian returned a few moments later bringing a tray of afternoon tea, although he no longer looked happy. Instead he looked incredibly displeased for some reason. "Young master, did you not bother to clean up after you baked those?" Sebastian asked as he placed the tray down.

Ciel's eyes widened as he suddenly remembered the mess they had made. When he had left the kitchen there had been flour, eggs, milk and dough all over the place. But cleaning up hadn't even crossed his mind. He had just assumed Baldroy would take care of that.

"You've ended up creating more work for me, young master. And you needn't have gone to all that effort for me." Sebastian added with an annoyed sigh.

"Well, now I wish I hadn't bothered! You ungrateful fool!" Ciel snapped back at him.

"I never asked you to make anything for me. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to tidy up the mess you left." Sebastian replied as he walked out.

Ciel groaned in exasperation as he took a bite from one of the cookies. It tasted deliciously sweet, but Ciel couldn't really enjoy it. Just when he had thought he had done something right, he'd driven a wedge between them again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yes, I'm still persevering with this fanfic despite having other projects to work on. I just love the idea of a clueless Ciel struggling to do anything romantic. As someone who is terrible at cooking, I sympathise with him a lot in this chapter.


	5. Romantic Date

 

The next day came and Ciel was woken up in the morning by his butler. His morning routine stayed the same as always, with Sebastian bringing him breakfast and dressing him. Although his butler never mentioned the crossed words they had the night before, Ciel could sense that his butler was still displeased.

Once Ciel was finished with his morning lessons he returned to his study. The rest of his day was free, with no business meetings, cases or paperwork. He gazed out of his window at the beautiful garden absentmindedly, before the fine weather reminded him of the next item on his list.

Pulling the list from his drawer again, Ciel looked down at the next item. _A romantic date._

In the novels Ciel had read, a romantic date could cover all manner of activities. But since Ciel was in love with his servant (and another male no less), there wasn't many options available to him. It would be impossible for them to have a romantic meal out or go to a dance, or anywhere in public. If anyone was to find out the Earl Phantomhive was romantically involved with his male servant, it would disgrace the family name.

Ciel leant back in his chair, letting out an annoyed sigh. They could possibly have a romantic meal in the manor, but that would mean Sebastian would have to do the cooking. On top of that, he didn't want the other servants realising how he felt about him. For a brief moment, the idea of dressing up as a lady again so they could dance together in public crossed his mind. But as Ciel remembered the girly pink dress and the painfully tight corset, the idea was quickly dismissed.

Ciel was so lost in his thoughts, he didn't notice Sebastian enter the study and stand beside his desk.

"Young master, you have been up here alone for a while. Is there anything I can get you?" His butler asked as politely as possible. But his eyes still showed the faintest trace of annoyance.

Ciel jumped in his seat, turning to look at his butler in surprise. "Sebastian?! Don't sneak up on me! Didn't I tell you to knock first?" He snapped, quickly shoving the list back into his drawer.

"Indeed you did, young master. But I did knock and you never answered." Sebastian replied.

"Oh... I'm sorry." Ciel responded, letting out another sigh as he gazed out of the window. The sky was clear and the sun was shining. It seemed such a waste not to take advantage of the lovely weather, but where could they possibly go together?

"Young master?..." Sebastian asked, confusion evident in his voice. It was unusual for his master to apologise for anything after all.

As Ciel continued to gaze out of the window an idea finally came to mind. Turning in his chair, he smirked up at his butler. "Sebastian, since my schedule is open today and the weather is so nice, I want you to prepare a picnic for us." He replied.

"For us? Are you going to make me eat human food again?" Sebastian asked, raising his eyebrow.

"What? No...unless you want to. I meant you're coming with me. That's all." Ciel said with a pout.

"Very well, young master. I'll start preparing it now." Sebastian replied with a bow, before leaving Ciel alone once again.

Barely ten minutes later and Sebastian had managed to prepare an elaborate picnic for Ciel, with a selection of sandwiches and various sweet treats. The two of them walked out into the garden together, Sebastian carrying a large basket containing the food and a blanket for them to sit on.

The Phantomhive gardens were so large that they could sit far away from the manor without even having to leave the grounds. Once they had found a nice spot, Ciel sat down on the blanket and waited for Sebastian to bring out the food.

"Is there any particular reason you wanted to do this, young master?" Sebastian asked as he laid out the sandwiches.

"I believe I already said. It's nice weather and seemed a shame not to take advantage." Ciel replied.

"I see. Is there any reason you wanted me to accompany you?" Sebastian inquired.

Once the food was all laid out, Ciel ignored the sandwiches completely and reached straight for some cake. Sebastian chuckled softly at this, but didn't bother scolding him.

"The thing is..." Ciel mumbled softly between mouthfuls of Victoria sponge. "You know...Sebastian...when it's peaceful and quiet like this, I actually enjoy your company." He replied.

He glanced over at his butler to see how he reacted, his cheeks flushed slightly pink. Sebastian was smiling back at him. But whether it was a genuinely warm smile or an amused smirk, he couldn't be sure.

"Do you ever enjoy being with me?" Ciel asked.

"There are times when it is very enjoyable being with you, yes." Sebastian replied. Ciel nodded, shuffling a little closer to his butler as he continued to eat his cake. Hesitantly, he reached his hand out and placed it over Sebastian's. Sebastian looked rather confused by this but didn't move his hand away.

They stayed sat like that for a long while. Ciel quietly continued to eat with his hand still resting on his butlers, staring up at him. Sebastian seemed to be gazing up at the sky above them. Romance wasn't something Ciel was an expert in, but he was pretty sure this scene could be described as romantic.

"Sebastian, there's something I want to tell you." He said suddenly, a dark blush on his cheeks as he gave his butler a serious look. He felt his heart beating much faster in his chest as he prepared to tell him how he really felt.

"The thing is...for a while now I... Sebastian, I..." Ciel stuttered nervously as he tried to get the words out. He blinked in surprise as he felt something wet fall on to his cheek. The bright blue sky suddenly became a dull grey colour as rain began to pour down on them.

"Can you perhaps tell me later, young master? We don't want you to get wet." Sebastian replied. Ciel let out a disappointed sigh as their hands broke apart, and his butler began hurryingly gathering up the picnic items.

Before he had a chance to say anything else he felt Sebastian's waistcoat being placed around him, and Sebastian's arms picking him up. He rested his head against his butler's chest as he was carried back to the manor. 

He had come so close to finally expressing his feelings, and yet the moment had been ruined by rain. With an annoyed pout he returned to his study, Sebastian's waistcoat still draped around his shoulders.

"Are you wet at all, young master?" Sebastian asked.

"No...I'm fine." Ciel mumbled.

"Very well. I'll bring you some afternoon tea." Sebastian replied as he left the room.

Once his butler had left Ciel slid the waistcoat from his shoulders and held it close, inhaling Sebastian's scent. He sighed, burying his head into the black fabric. _Stupid English weather._

He felt even more depressed and frustrated than before. For him to come so close and yet fail just because of the weather, it seemed so unfair. Ciel turned to look out of the window, pouting as he watched the heavy rainfall. _Maybe it's a sign. Maybe I'm just not supposed to tell him how I feel._

As he gazed out of the window, an idea suddenly came to mind. Quickly pulling the list from his drawer he glanced at it once more, before shoving it back inside, crumpling the paper slightly.

He got up from his chair and rushed out of the room, leaving the waistcoat behind.

By the time Sebastian returned he found only an empty room. His young master was already outside getting soaked in the pouring rain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's an update, because I am determined to finish this story even though I still have no idea how the last chapter is gonna go. But at least with this one I have a rough idea, since I'm struggling to write for some of my other fandoms right now. And yes, there is a valid reason for Ciel going out in the rain. You'll just have to wait until the next chapter to find out.


	6. Nursing

 

There were only so many ideas that Ciel could take from the romance novels he read, the most obvious practical ideas being gifts such as flowers or homemade food. But there was one recurring scene that he had come across several times. In many of the novels, either the young lady had fallen ill or the gentleman had become injured for some reason. This always resulted in them being taken care of, which oddly lead to quite a romantic scene.

Since Sebastian had been asleep the whole time, Ciel was left with no opportunity to nurse him or recreate those romantic scenes. For a very brief moment Ciel had wondered if Sebastian may become injured again. But as he recalled the sight of his butler lying in their small lifeboat, blood pooling around him and shuddering in pain, Ciel quickly dismissed the idea.

That moment had been one of the most terrifying moments in Ciel's life. It had really felt like he might lose his butler forever, and he never wanted that moment to be repeated.

Ciel had more or less dismissed the idea completely since it was so impractical, but had scribbled down _Nursing them when they are sick or injured._

It had seemed so impractical when he first wrote it down. Demons didn't get sick, and it wasn't worth Sebastian being injured again. But after seeing the rain pouring down heavily outside, a new idea has crossed Ciel's mind. Perhaps if Ciel was to become sick, he and his butler could share a romantic moment while Sebastian nursed him back to health.

With that idea in mind Ciel had ventured out into the rain without a coat or jacket. He had walked around the gardens purposely getting soaked as he made sure he would definitely come down with a cold. Even as he started to shiver and his asthma caused him to cough painfully, he still continued to wander around in the rain.

Ciel soon fell to his knees, his breathing becoming laboured as he started to have an asthma attack. He could hear the distant sound of his butler's voice calling out for him. Letting out a loud cough, Ciel tried to call back to his butler but his voice failed him. He collapsed on to the wet ground as he passed out.

When Ciel next woke up he found himself in his bed, dressed in high nightshirt with warm covers placed over him. He could feel a cold towel placed on his forehead.

"Seb...Seba..stian..." He croaked, his voice hoarse and barely audible.

"Young master." His butler replied, leaning over him. Ciel had expected his butler to be soothing and comforting, but instead he seemed to be glaring furiously at him. Ciel gazed up at him, confused. It was very rare to see Sebastian so angry.

"Young master, you did a very stupid thing and now you've fallen ill." Sebastian said harshly. He sighed as he removed the towel from Ciel's forehead, gently placing his hand against him. "Your fever is still very high." He mumbled.

"It's alright... I have you to take care of me." Ciel whispered, attempting a smile.

"It's not alright, young master." Sebastian replied sternly as he placed another wet towel on Ciel's forehead. He then stood up and walked over to the fireplace, lighting the fire so the room was warm. "You rely on me too much, young master. You should value your health and try and look after yourself more. There are circumstances which even I can't always save you from." He added, his back facing Ciel's bed.

Ciel rolled on to his side to face him, the damp towel on his forehead sliding down on to the pillow. He let out a small cough as he reached his arm out towards his butler. As the covers slid down slightly he shivered from the cold. "Sebastian...don't be angry. Everyone falls ill sometimes." He murmured weakly.

Sebastian turned back to face him, looking incredibly displeased as he walked towards the bed. "Yes young master, I'm aware that humans often fall ill. But in this situation you have only yourself to blame." he replied, letting out an annoyed sigh. "Good grief, you carelessly went out into the rain like that. And now you refuse to rest." He sighed as he pulled the covers back over Ciel, attempting to tuck Ciel's arm back under them.

"Fine, I get it! I'm so sorry I'm such a pain for you to look after!" Ciel snapped angrily as he swatted his butler's hand away. He rolled over on to his other side, facing away from him. "Just go if it's that annoying to you. I'm going to sleep anyway." He mumbled.

"Young master, it isn't a pain for me to look after you. I will always serve you as best I can. I just wish you would take a little more consideration for your own well being." Sebastian replied, his voice no longer sounding angry.

Ciel slowly turned back to face his butler, gazing up at him. "So... you were just worried about me?" He asked.

"Yes, of course I was worried for you, young master." Sebastian replied, letting out a small sigh as he leant over him.

Ciel continued to stare into his butler's eyes curiously. He was tempted to ask if Sebastian was only worried just because he wanted Ciel's soul, but decided against it. He was rather scared of what the answer might be.

"Is there anything I can get you, young master? Or would you like to try and sleep now?" Sebastian asked.

"Some water..." Ciel murmured softly as he tried to sit up. He blushed as he felt Sebastian's arms around his waist and helped him to sit up. Sebastian passed Ciel a glass of water, watching his master curiously.

"Your cheeks look a little flushed. Perhaps your fever is getting worse again." Sebastian said softly, his voice full of concern as he gently ran his fingers along Ciel's cheeks.

Ciel's flushed an even darker red. "I'm...I'm fine! Perfectly fine!" He replied in panic, quickly thrusting the glass of water back towards his butler.

"Sebastian...will you stay with me until I fall asleep?" Ciel asked suddenly.

"Of course, young master." Sebastian replied with a smile. Ciel couldn't help but pout a little when his butler remained standing by the side of the bed.

"Sit next to me..." Ciel mumbled, pulling the covers back and patting the space on the mattress next to him. Sebastian gave him an incredibly confused look but slowly slid off his shoes and climbed into the bed next to him.

Before Sebastian could ask why his master had requested such a thing, he felt Ciel nudge a little closer to him, leaning against his shoulder. Sebastian gently placed his arm around Ciel.

"You feel nice and warm." Ciel mumbled softly as he nuzzled into Sebastian's chest. They stayed like that until Sebastian heard his master's breathing becoming slow and heavy as he fell into a deep sleep. He gently lowered Ciel back down on to the bed, pulling the covers over him. Sebastian then leant forward and pressed a soft kiss against Ciel's forehead.

"Sleep well, young master." He whispered softly.

Sebastian crept out of the room as quietly as possible and then headed back towards the study. His young master falling ill had distracted him, and he hadn't yet tidied away the afternoon tea from before.

"Such a shame it went to waste." Sebastian murmured quietly as he picked up the tray of tea from Ciel's desk. As he turned to leave the room something caught Sebastian's eye. There was a small crumpled piece of white paper sticking out from the desk drawer.

Sebastian put the tray of tea back down and pulled open the drawer curiously. He was surprised to see some red roses with most of the petals falling away inside. So his young master had been the one who had picked the roses, but he couldn't think why Ciel would want to.

The butler's eyes widened as he read the contents of the paper, before chuckling softly. "Well now...this does make for some interesting reading." He said with an amused smirk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a long gap between chapters again, but here is another update. The next chapter will be the last one, and I'm really not sure how to end it so any ideas will be appreciated. It will be at least a week before I update again though since I won't have wifi for a while. I'm gonna be going away and trying to work out myself and what I want to do. But writing isn't a thing I want to give up so I should be posting regularly again soon. Also, sorry to anyone who supports me on amino because for some reason my account seems to be blocked from accessing my groups.


	7. Confessions

 

When Ciel next woke up, the first thing he noticed was the dull ache throbbing in his head. He groggily rubbed the sleep from his eyes and glanced around the room, trying to remember what exactly had happened before he had fallen into a deep sleep. Memories of freezing cold rain and harsh winds came flooding back, causing Ciel to let out a frustrated sigh.

Yes, that was it. He had gone outside in harsh weather to purposefully fall ill, and he was certainly paying for it now. That would also explain the sweat clinging to his forehead and the slight burning in his throat. 

As Ciel forced himself up into a sitting position, another memory came flooding back and caused a bright blush to paint his cheeks. The very last thing he remembered was nuzzling into Sebastian’s chest, the butler’s arms around him in a comforting embrace. But had that really happened or had it been a dream? Even if it had been a dream, that didn’t explain the butler’s absence in the room. 

“Seb-” Ciel attempted to call out but was abruptly cut off by a harsh coughing fit. “Ah...damn it. Stupid butler…” He murmured quietly as he reached over towards the bedside table. It was then that he first noticed it. The jug of water he had been looking for was there just as he expected, but beside it was a large ornamental vase filled with a bouquet of white roses. 

Ciel simply stared at the flowers in bewilderment. They definitely hadn’t been on his bedside table before, and he couldn’t think of any reason why they would be there now. Could Lizzie have visited while he was asleep and left them as a gift? No, she surely would have woken him up if that had been the case. 

Before Ciel had a chance to ponder this any further, Sebastian had entered the room carrying a bowl of soup on a tray. “Ah, young master. I see you’re finally awake.” He commented, giving Ciel a warm smile. 

“How long was I asleep for?” Ciel asked. 

“A few hours, young master. But I suspected you would be feeling a little hungry by now.” Sebastian explained, walking over to the side of the bed and placing the tray down on the bedside table. He then leaned over and propped up Ciel’s pillows, before pouring him a glass of water from the jug and handing it to him.    
  
Ciel couldn’t help but stare back at his butler with a confused expression. Having the demon take care of him and do everything for him wasn’t particularly unusual, as Sebastian made a point to try and be the perfect attentive butler at all times. What was unusual however was the devious smirk he wore the entire time. 

Was the butler enjoying taking care of him? That didn’t seem to make any sense though, considering Sebastian’s earlier reaction to his master falling ill. Ciel decided not to question it, and instead focused his attention back to the bouquet of roses.

“What are the flowers for?” He asked, taking a small sip of water before passing the glass back.    
  
“They are not for anything, young master. I believe you humans simply find them aesthetically pleasing.” Sebastian offered as a response, his smirk widening.    
  
Ciel let out a frustrated sigh, rolling his eyes at him. “You know what I mean! Why is there now a bouquet of flowers next to my bed?” 

“I took them from the gardens earlier while you were sleeping. I thought it would be a nice sight for you to wake up to.” Sebastian replied. 

“Oh...Well, thank you?” Ciel murmured, a little unsure of what to think. 

“A promised gift, a pleasing sight, for eyes of brightest blue. To make you smile, to aid your health, these flowers are for you.” Sebastian said softly in a rather melodic way. 

Ciel froze and gaped at his butler for a long moment, wondering what on earth had just happened. Was he singing? Had he thought of those words himself? But Ciel couldn’t think of a reason why he would need to...unless this was another foolish idea of Soma’s or Lizzie’s to make the butler act  _ nice. _

Before the earl even had a chance to try and comprehend his servant’s actions, Sebastian was leaning over him once more and placing the tray of soup in front of him as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. The soup looked delicious as always; with a few freshly baked bread rolls on the side. 

“I thought this would help you on your way to recovery, young master.” Sebastian said with a smile. “Food is even better when it is homemade and comes from the heart. Isn’t that something you humans say?” 

Ciel flinched slightly at the butler’s words. His behaviour seemed to be getting more unusual with every passing second. It was normal for his butler to cook for Ciel, so it seemed odd to suddenly point it out now. “I suppose we do...yes…” Ciel mumbled softly. 

Sebastian straightened up and remained by his master’s bedside, the same mischievous grin from before never leaving his face. “It’s rather like having a mini picnic in bed, is it not?” He asked.

“You have a very odd idea of what a picnic is.” Ciel remarked as he scooped up a spoonful of soup. Despite wanting to spend time with his butler before, he was now rather hoping Sebastian would just stop talking, or at the very least talk about something a little more normal. 

Ciel’s hand quivered briefly as he tried to eat, causing him to curse under his breath as the soup sloshed back into the bowl. In barely a second his butler was leaning in close, taking the spoon from him and holding it to his lips. 

Ciel blushed slightly, allowing his butler to feed him in his weakened state. It reminded him of the time he had fallen ill after investigating the Noah’s Ark Circus, and Sebastian had cared for him then. This was the sort of close interaction Ciel had been hoping for. 

They remained like that for a good few minutes; Sebastian lightly blowing on the soup to cool it down and offering it to his master, before the butler finally broke the silence. “This is rather romantic isn’t it?” He questioned with a soft chuckle.   
  
_ Romantic?!  _ Ciel thought, his eyes widening in surprise. Was his butler being serious? 

“I...I suppose…” Ciel mumbled.    
  
“Not unlike something out of a romance novel, wouldn’t you say?” 

Ciel immediately tensed up, everything instantly falling into place. His odd behaviour became clear in an instant. The flowers on the bedside table, the odd song, the talk of home made food and picnics; all of them had been ideas Ciel had jotted down on his list. Sebastian must have found it and worked out what his master had been up to. 

“You saw it, didn’t you?” Ciel growled.

“What exactly are you referring to, young master?” Sebastian asked. 

“Don’t play dumb with me! That list in my study! You saw it and you’ve been teasing me all this time!” Ciel snapped harshly. He grimaced at the discomfort in his throat but tried to ignore it. 

“Yes, I did find the list. It was sticking out of your drawer when I went to clear away the tea from earlier, so it wasn’t exactly hidden well if it was meant to be a secret.” Sebastian explained. 

Ciel dropped his head into his hands, refusing to look his butler in the eye. His cheeks were now turning dark pink from embarrassment. 

“I also found the attempts at poems you left behind, and the crumpled roses.” Sebastian added. When his master didn’t reply, he reached out a gloved hand towards him and placed it on his shoulder. “Why did you-”   


“Why do you think?!” Ciel shouted, angrily slapping his hand away. 

Sebastian took a step back, withdrawing his hand with wide eyes.    
  
“You...Why do you think I did all of that? You must have worked that out as well?” Ciel whimpered softly, still refusing to look up at the demon. “I’ve been trying so hard all this time to convey my feelings for you...these feelings I’m not even sure of myself. And every time something went wrong. Maybe I was a fool to ever try with this, but I just wanted you to understand…” 

There was a long moment of silence between them, the seconds seeming to drag by painfully slow. Ciel was sure this was the most tense things had ever been between them. He felt overcome with dread and anxiety as he waited for his butler to say something. 

“You could have simply said it in words.” Sebastian answered at last.    
  
Ciel slowly lifted his head up to stare at him in bewilderment. “As if it’s that easy…” He sighed. 

“Young master…” Sebastian exhaled, shaking his head softly as he moved to sit down on the side of the bed beside the small earl. “You humans seem to enjoy making everything unnecessarily complicated. I now know what you’ve been trying to tell me all this time, but you could have simply said it in words. I believe that would have been easier.” 

“It’s not...It’s not easy…” Ciel choked out. 

“It is easy. Let me show you.” Sebastian gently placed his finger under the earl’s chin and tilted his head up, gazing into his mismatched eyes. “I love you too.” With those words finally said he placed an affectionate kiss to his master’s forehead. 

Ciel felt like his heart might stop right at that very moment, too in shock to say the words back. But it didn’t matter; at least for now. His butler knew. 

A few moments later Sebastian pulled away, silence filling the room once more as the butler returned to feeding his sick master. 

“...Do you mean it?” Ciel managed to ask nervously.

“Yes, my lord. I cannot lie to you.” Sebastian spoke with a warm smile. 

Ciel let out a relieved sigh, relaxing against his butler’s side. Every shred of worry and fear and frustration he had felt over the last few days dissipated, leaving him with only a warm content feeling.

He didn’t know those three words were so hard to say out loud, or why he had wasted so much time trying to convey his feelings to Sebastian through other means. He wasn’t even sure how their relationship would change from this moment on. But they both knew now how the other felt, and that was all he had wanted. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here we are! The last chapter! I came very close to posting this quite a while ago, but unfortunately a hell of a lot has happened. I had a birthday, a relative ended up in hospital and still is sadly, I had to leave my home so I'm now staying somewhere else and I'm in he process of moving permanently. 
> 
> I am also a terrible procrastinator. I have so many ideas for fics, but my mind goes "You can do them later!" which is not a good thing. I'm still determined to write though because it's about the only thing I am remotely good at. So sorry for the long wait, hopefully this isn't too much of a disappointment. I also now have a twitter nobody cares about if you want to follow me on there: @MonoVarnham


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